smb

[Edited 2020-03-25 by smb: I can't remember even posting this - let alone where it came from?! Anyway, it's nice - so I decided to keep it - and full credits to whoever wrote this, by the way!] Sand and Stone TWO FRIENDS WERE WALKING THROUGH THE DESERT. DURING SOME POINT OF THE JOURNEY, THEY HAD AN ARGUMENT; AND ONE FRIEND SLAPPED THE OTHER ONE IN THE FACE. THE ONE WHO GOT SLAPPED WAS HURT, BUT WITHOUT SAYING ANYTHING, WROTE IN THE SAND: 'TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE.' THEY KEPT ON WALKING, UNTIL THEY FOUND AN OASIS, WHERE THEY DECIDED TO HAVE A SWIM... THE ONE WHO HAD BEEN SLAPPED GOT STUCK IN THE MIRE AND STARTED DROWNING. BUT THE FRIEND SAVED HIM. AFTER HE RECOVERED FROM THE NEAR DROWNING, HE WROTE ON A STONE: 'TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SAVED MY LIFE.' THE FRIEND WHO HAD SLAPPED AND SAVED HIS BEST FRIEND ASKED HIM : 'AFTER I HURT YOU, YOU WROTE IN THE SAND AND NOW, YOU WRITE ON A STONE. WHY?' THE FRIEND REPLIED: 'WHEN SOMEONE HURTS US WE SHOULD WRITE IT DOWN IN SAND, WHERE THE WINDS OF FORGIVENESS CAN ERASE IT. BUT, WHEN SOMEONE DOES SOMETHING GOOD FOR US, WE MUST ENGRAVE IT IN STONE WHERE NO WIND CAN EVER ERASE IT.' LEARN TO WRITE YOUR HURTS IN THE SAND AND TO CARVE YOUR BENEFITS IN STONE. THEY SAY IT TAKES A MINUTE TO FIND A SPECIAL PERSON, AN HOUR TO APPRECIATE THEM, A DAY TO LOVE THEM - BUT THEN AN ENTIRE LIFE TO FORGET THEM. TAKE THE TIME TO LIVE! DO NOT VALUE THE THINGS YOU HAVE IN YOUR LIFE... VALUE WHO YOU HAVE IN YOUR LIFE

London Times Obituary of the late Mr. Common Sense:

Women Drivers! This morning on the Interstate, I looked over to my left and there was a Woman In a brand new Cadillac Doing 65 mph With her Face up next to her Rear view mirror Putting on her eyeliner. I looked away For a couple seconds ! And when I looked back she was Halfway over in my lane, Still working on that makeup. As a man, I don't scare easily. But she scared me so much; I dropped my electric shaver, Which knocked The donut Out of my other hand. In all the confusion of trying To straighten out the car Using my knees against The steering wheel, it knocked my cell phone away from my ear which fell into the coffee between my legs, splashed, and burned Big Jim and the Twins, ruined the damn phone, soaked my trousers, and disconnected an important call. Damn women drivers!!

Breeding Bulls A man took his wife to the rodeo and one of the first exhibits they stopped at was the breeding bulls. They went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said, "THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR" The wife playfully nudged her husband in the ribs and said, "He mated 50 times last year." They walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said, " "THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR" The wife gave her husband a healthy jab and said, "That's more than twice a week! You could learn a lot from him." They walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said, in capital letters, "THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR" The wife, so excited that her elbow nearly broke her husband's ribs, said,"That's once a day.You could REALLY learn something from this one The husband looked at her and said, "Go over and ask him if it was with the same old cow."

THE BEST COMEBACK LINE for 2007... For those that don't know him, Major General Peter Cosgrove is an 'Australian treasure!' General Cosgrove was interviewed on the radio recently. You'll love his reply to the lady who interviewed him concerning guns and children. Regardless of how you feel about gun laws you gotta love this! This is one of the best comeback lines of all time. It is a portion of an ABC interview between a female broadcaster and General Cosgrove who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop visiting his military headquarters. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: So, General Cosgrove, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base? GENERAL COSGROVE: We're going to teach them climbing, canoing, archery and shooting. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible, isn't it? GENERAL COSGROVE: I don't see why, they'll be properly supervised on the rifle range. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children? GENERAL COSGROVE: I don't see how. We will be teaching them proper rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: But you're equipping them to become violent killers. GENERAL COSGROVE: Well, Ma'am, you're equipped to be a prostitute, but you're not one, are you? The radio went silent and the interview ended.

Hi! Welcome to artfreaks.com - and thanks for the tips! I just got back home, after a couple of months work and I hope to be getting back into painting soon. I can't wait!! I'll give you're suggestions a try and see if it works for me? (To be honest, I think the overstated shading and ridiculously bright colors suite my character - and that is what I am happy with!! Anyway, it certainly wouldn't hurt to try a different technique and I'll certainly give it a go...) By the way, I hope you can avail of your free gallery space for amateur and professional artists and upload some of your work. (I want to see how this more subtle shading thing works!!!)

Thanks for setting up your own blog at artfreaks.com I'm looking forward to seeing some more of your poetry in here. Keep it coming!

Nice work! Thanks for posting these.

From a former member, nicbrun77: I can only say what works for me... I have only tried pencil drawings and pastel paintings so far. The pastels, I always photograph before framing behind glass. (In the case of an oil painting, I would photograph the thing before applying any vanish?) I always take the photographs outdoors - in a bright spot but out of direct sunlight. I make sure that the flash is turned off and I am not casting a shadow on the painting. If there is enough, well-diffused light, I don't think you need a tripod - just try to hold the camera reasonably steady while you press the shutter. The cameras that most people are using these days all have auto-focus... If you are using auto-focus, usually you have to depress the shutter half way, keep it like that for a second or two, in order to allow the focusing mechanism to do its thing - and THEN press the shutter all the way. Lastly, before taking the shot, I make sure that the camera is positioned exactly on the axis of the centre of the painting and not skewed at an angle. Oh! And then you really need to use any simple photo editing software, just to crop your image before uploading. It also helps if you can reduce your image file size to about 350Kb or less so that it doesn't take forever to upload. (I use U-lead Photo Explorer - both for cropping and reducing the image size. Mine came with the camera - but I believe if you do a search on Google, you can down-load U-Lead Photo Explorer for free?) 'Hope this helps!